Our train ride to Guilin is much less eventful than its predecessor despite early indications of it being way more bonkers. Since our tickets are standing room only, our plan upon boarding is to make a direct line for the cafe car. Much to our horror we discover the passage to the dining car locked with no feasible means of entry. Dejected, we proceed back to our car for an anticipated 6 hours of standing. A female train crew official spots us and hastily directs us to the end of the car where she makes a Chinese man stand and relocate across the aisle. We are then afforded the two seats vacated by his departure.
Apparently it is not allowable etiquette for foreigners to stand on a six hour train in China. We apologize sheepishly to those around us and say nothing more. A young man, maybe in his early 20's, sits across from us and begins immediately devouring his instant noodles into which he adds sausage, seaweed, and a host of very hot looking spices. To be honest, this man looks terrible. As if he just came off a redeye from 4 day bender in Vegas. Comparatively we're feeling great. For the next six hours we watch him sweat and try to sleep it off.
We arrive in Guilin at dusk and I'm already stricken by how much prettier it is than the other two cities we visited. In the distance you can see the outlines of countless undulating hills slowly disappearing into the dusk-light.
Along the river we can make out the Gold and Silver Pagodas, aptly lit in the rapidly approaching darkness. There is some sort of festival and crowds are beginning to gather in the main square. But before we join them we have business to take care of.
In Nanning, the one truly productive thing we did accomplish was the creation of a new game for the show. Another one of my brilliant brain children that I almost immediately with I had aborted, the game is called the McDonald's Double Cheeseburger Double-Up Challenge (MDDCDUC) and it is played as follows: before arriving in each city in China Jon and I would make a bet (alternating who gets to bet first) about the number of McDonald's we believe we will encounter in that city. Whoever is the closest to the actual number we spot wins the bet. The loser has to eat an increasingly doubling double cheeseburger.
The game started in Nanning. Jon lost the first round and so in Guilin he was obligated to eat a double cheeseburger. On the train we lay our bets for Guilin. The loser of this round will be required to eat a quad-burger (four patties, four slices of cheese, and all the condiments on one bun). The next round would be six, then eight, and finally ten. In the event of a tie (meaning we were equidistant from the actual number of McDonald's we spotted), we would be required to split the burger. As a show of good faith (and since I changed my bet after answering initially) I eat one with Jon and we walk back to the main square.
After watching a number of traditional dance routines we repair to the hostel where we book a tour to see the rice terraces at Da Zhai. We are told there are two others interested in the tour and that we should meet at 8:30am. We agree and soldier off to bed. The next morning we take the few hour bus ride to the village of Da Zhai, peacefully nestled on all sides by terraced hills.
The four of us, Jon, myself, and new friends Monika and Julia from Poland, decide to hike to the top rather than take the chair lift. It's quite the endeavor but provides us with some spectacular views of the terraces.
At this time of year the fields are being tended for planting. The rains will be coming in a month or so and by mid-July each of these terraces will create a series of near-perfect mirrors, reflecting the light off the surface of the water save for the tiny flecks of rice poking up. We look down and see workers beginning the planting process.
As expected, the higher we climb the more spectacular the views get.
Some of the patterns along the hills seem almost impossible to make and maintain.
We eventually reach the top and are able to see past the chair lift and all the way into the valley of Da Zhai itself.
We trek down tediously but not without some near misshaps.
In Da Zhai itself you see the product of the field terracing reaching its conclusion as the water runoff from the innumerable fields above finally makes its way into the town to irrigate the crops in close proximity. It is of course also the main water source for the village itself.
We pass the remaining hour or so until our driver picks us up with a round of beers and rice at a local watering hole, our Chinese waitress flabbergasted that we would order only beer, water and rice. We try to convey that we are lean mean souls but it doesn't seem to come across. Back on the bus it's a long winding road back to the hostel along which Jon convinces our two companions to accompany us to a round of karaoke that evening.
They agree but prior to embarking on our karaoke venture, Yang from the hostel teaches us all how to play mahjong. Jon and I are naturals. The four of us taxi over to the karaoke place and after some brief price haggling are posted up in a room. Unfortunately I don't have any pictures from the karaoke outing but suffice it to say it goes as bonkers as you would anticipate. Yang eventually shows up with the hostel crew and a few more hostel-mates and it isn't long before mayhem has taken over and Yang is blasting an air guitar to 80's rock music. Good times.
The other notable thing to occur this evening is that I officially lose the second round of the MDDCDUC, which means I'm obligated to eat a quad-burger as soon as feasibly possible. Awesome. We eventually all make it back to the hostel and crash after a long, weary, boozy, fun day in Guilin.
The next morning we piddle around the hostel recovering from last night and waiting for the girls' taxi to arrive. We take a brief walk in the drizzle outside but it's a pointless endeavor. The girls are eventually shuttled away to catch their train and Jon and I make our way up the main drag in the rain, challenging the elements. I invoke them to make me feel more dread than I already do about facing the quad-burger. He dares them to make him feel worse about the departure of his new lady-friend. Eventually we arrive at McDonald's and it's time to put up or... put up. So I get to work.
I feel groggy... and full... yet not... damn these chemicals! My kidneys are already in shut down mode and considering the weather we decide to seek out an indoor activity. We elect to watch Ironman 3. Normally I'm not a big fan of seeing movies abroad unless it's crazy cheap and it's crazy hot outside (looking at you Malaysia), but this was a good call. Additionally, we got to see a special scene shot solely for Chinese audiences featuring China's ultra-mega-uber-star Fan Bing Bing (who was the centerpiece of a film we saw back in Thailand - Lost in Bangkok). The layers of coincidence just keep piling.
The next day we've got another activity planned. Jon is ready and raring to go. Today: another thing I've wanted to do for a long long time... a cruise up the Li River. Our bus stops and gives us 15 minutes or so for refreshments and pictures before we board our "bamboo" boats for our Li River cruise. The contemporary vessels are the fiberglass renditions of the formerly authentic bamboo boats.
While we're standing around taking pictures we apparently miss the migration down the docks to the boats. By the time we realize we've been left behind, we're required to make a mad sprint down to "our" boats. First of all, why the hell would they drop us off in an area of the docks not near our boats? Secondly, why isn't there someone to make it very clear that the group was migrating? We hear no warning, no direction, nothing. F these guys. Anyway, we make it, we're strapped up with orange and we're on our way.
The rest of the boat trip is actually awesome. We're out on the river for an hour to an hour and a half. We start out dead last in the flotilla. How are we so far behind? Gun it my good man! Even the two Chinese girls sharing our boat are flabbergasted with our current lack of pace.
But in all seriousness (yes we were losing but that's not the important thing), the view up the Li River was absolutely spectacular. There's simply no other way to describe it.
But... then again, guess what biddies?! Suddenly we're nearly running this show! "Faster! FASTER! PUT IT TO THE FLOOR!" we yell at our captain, who can't be older than 16. Suddenly it HAS become a competition. I... sometimes... I just can't help myself. Now what sucka? We be in first place!
And at the turn, we have such a lead we have time to swap in and out of boats about three times before having to shag ass back downriver. From this point we can see both up and down the Li.
"We get off our boat, get on a new boat, drink 20 beers, get off that boat, fall in the water, build a hot-air balloon, take off, drink 20 more beers, hate it, blow it up, fall 200 feet into the river, break all of our bones, get back on the second boat, dry off, drink another 20 beers, re-amalgamate our bones with tribal healing, drink a final 20 beers, and are eventually requisitioned back to the first boat. And we are still ahead of everyone else. That's called being the biggest bosses these bamboo-riding-clowns have seen thus far. Seriously." These are the words of Flange, not your humble author.
Thanks for that input Flange! Uh... moving on. After placating Flange with a few cool-down-beers we head back down river and find some awesome shots of the mountains in the low cloud cover.
On the way back Jon puts in some serious camera work. It's beautiful. At that moment I wonder how much of it will translate to film. Clearly not nearly enough translates to pictures.
Eventually we're so far ahead of everyone else we're about to lap the group that set out 30 minutes before us. Granted this costs us some time on the river but then again there is no feeling like starting dead last and finishing first. And going oo fast you beat boats in a totally different race... well, now you're just showing off.
We love acting a fool. But so does this tour company. They proclaim (after we're on the bus) that if we don't want to take the optional 'village' tour they're going to drop us in Yangshuo. Thus trying to strong arm us into paying for an extra tour we don't want. We figure- screw you guys. We know we can get a bus for a small handful of Mao's and we can check out that cool little town for a few hours. Plus, coming from Vietnam and the entire of SE Asia, we're in no mood to be hustled for crap we don't want or need. So we politely decline. It proves to be a wise and well-thought decision. Yangshuo is beautiful.
Almost everywhere you look in this town there's some spectacle demanding investigation. We decide to pause and take our time soaking in the small town's affairs. We have lunch at a local shop, opting for some appetizers, noodles, and local beers. We stroll down the main avenue peeking into the stores. Eventually it's time to make our way back to the bus station to hop our return-ride to Guilin.
On our way to the bus station I'm able to capture the above image- a wonderful illustration of the busy yet complacent of life in Yangshuo. Unfortunately we don't have the time to explore the temples and sites in the immediate vicinity such as the one on the hill in the background of the above photo, however, spending time further exploring this region is something I've added to my increasingly growing to-do-upon-return list.
We make our way back to Guilin via bus well prepared- with beers and snacks in tow, obviously. We roll along meeting some new friends who are in school in the area. The ride is more or less uneventful save for a mad dash to find a place to pee upon arrival. One of these nights Jon and I head to the crafts district. I acquire (not surprisingly) a bracelet, but more importantly we locate a place we come to describe as Captain Jack Sparrow's Pirate Beer Bar. That's definitely not the name but it definitely IS a beer bar proffering three types of beer (dark, amber, and light), and is adorned entirely with Jack Sparrow dioramas and other pirate gear.
Copyrights be damned, this place is awesome! We order a huge giraffe of dark beer and ask if they have any dumplings. The don't- but they're so cool one of the guys runs out and finds some for us. And instead of charging us whatever he felt (which he easily could have), he politely charges us the same price he paid. I'm frankly in love with this bar. Why can't we just live here?!?
I feel groggy... and full... yet not... damn these chemicals! My kidneys are already in shut down mode and considering the weather we decide to seek out an indoor activity. We elect to watch Ironman 3. Normally I'm not a big fan of seeing movies abroad unless it's crazy cheap and it's crazy hot outside (looking at you Malaysia), but this was a good call. Additionally, we got to see a special scene shot solely for Chinese audiences featuring China's ultra-mega-uber-star Fan Bing Bing (who was the centerpiece of a film we saw back in Thailand - Lost in Bangkok). The layers of coincidence just keep piling.
The next day we've got another activity planned. Jon is ready and raring to go. Today: another thing I've wanted to do for a long long time... a cruise up the Li River. Our bus stops and gives us 15 minutes or so for refreshments and pictures before we board our "bamboo" boats for our Li River cruise. The contemporary vessels are the fiberglass renditions of the formerly authentic bamboo boats.
While we're standing around taking pictures we apparently miss the migration down the docks to the boats. By the time we realize we've been left behind, we're required to make a mad sprint down to "our" boats. First of all, why the hell would they drop us off in an area of the docks not near our boats? Secondly, why isn't there someone to make it very clear that the group was migrating? We hear no warning, no direction, nothing. F these guys. Anyway, we make it, we're strapped up with orange and we're on our way.
The rest of the boat trip is actually awesome. We're out on the river for an hour to an hour and a half. We start out dead last in the flotilla. How are we so far behind? Gun it my good man! Even the two Chinese girls sharing our boat are flabbergasted with our current lack of pace.
But in all seriousness (yes we were losing but that's not the important thing), the view up the Li River was absolutely spectacular. There's simply no other way to describe it.
But... then again, guess what biddies?! Suddenly we're nearly running this show! "Faster! FASTER! PUT IT TO THE FLOOR!" we yell at our captain, who can't be older than 16. Suddenly it HAS become a competition. I... sometimes... I just can't help myself. Now what sucka? We be in first place!
And at the turn, we have such a lead we have time to swap in and out of boats about three times before having to shag ass back downriver. From this point we can see both up and down the Li.
"We get off our boat, get on a new boat, drink 20 beers, get off that boat, fall in the water, build a hot-air balloon, take off, drink 20 more beers, hate it, blow it up, fall 200 feet into the river, break all of our bones, get back on the second boat, dry off, drink another 20 beers, re-amalgamate our bones with tribal healing, drink a final 20 beers, and are eventually requisitioned back to the first boat. And we are still ahead of everyone else. That's called being the biggest bosses these bamboo-riding-clowns have seen thus far. Seriously." These are the words of Flange, not your humble author.
Thanks for that input Flange! Uh... moving on. After placating Flange with a few cool-down-beers we head back down river and find some awesome shots of the mountains in the low cloud cover.
On the way back Jon puts in some serious camera work. It's beautiful. At that moment I wonder how much of it will translate to film. Clearly not nearly enough translates to pictures.
Eventually we're so far ahead of everyone else we're about to lap the group that set out 30 minutes before us. Granted this costs us some time on the river but then again there is no feeling like starting dead last and finishing first. And going oo fast you beat boats in a totally different race... well, now you're just showing off.
We love acting a fool. But so does this tour company. They proclaim (after we're on the bus) that if we don't want to take the optional 'village' tour they're going to drop us in Yangshuo. Thus trying to strong arm us into paying for an extra tour we don't want. We figure- screw you guys. We know we can get a bus for a small handful of Mao's and we can check out that cool little town for a few hours. Plus, coming from Vietnam and the entire of SE Asia, we're in no mood to be hustled for crap we don't want or need. So we politely decline. It proves to be a wise and well-thought decision. Yangshuo is beautiful.
Almost everywhere you look in this town there's some spectacle demanding investigation. We decide to pause and take our time soaking in the small town's affairs. We have lunch at a local shop, opting for some appetizers, noodles, and local beers. We stroll down the main avenue peeking into the stores. Eventually it's time to make our way back to the bus station to hop our return-ride to Guilin.
On our way to the bus station I'm able to capture the above image- a wonderful illustration of the busy yet complacent of life in Yangshuo. Unfortunately we don't have the time to explore the temples and sites in the immediate vicinity such as the one on the hill in the background of the above photo, however, spending time further exploring this region is something I've added to my increasingly growing to-do-upon-return list.
We make our way back to Guilin via bus well prepared- with beers and snacks in tow, obviously. We roll along meeting some new friends who are in school in the area. The ride is more or less uneventful save for a mad dash to find a place to pee upon arrival. One of these nights Jon and I head to the crafts district. I acquire (not surprisingly) a bracelet, but more importantly we locate a place we come to describe as Captain Jack Sparrow's Pirate Beer Bar. That's definitely not the name but it definitely IS a beer bar proffering three types of beer (dark, amber, and light), and is adorned entirely with Jack Sparrow dioramas and other pirate gear.
Copyrights be damned, this place is awesome! We order a huge giraffe of dark beer and ask if they have any dumplings. The don't- but they're so cool one of the guys runs out and finds some for us. And instead of charging us whatever he felt (which he easily could have), he politely charges us the same price he paid. I'm frankly in love with this bar. Why can't we just live here?!?
Our last day in Guilin we have two basic objectives: (1) actually see the main part and sights of Guilin city; and (2) make our night train to Guangzhou. To the first I have a simple plan, see elephant trunk hill (that supposedly looks like an elephant dunking its trunk in the water), visit the pagodas, head into old town to find the Solitary Beauty Peak (a sole mountain in the middle of town adorned with a temple), find the old city wall, and discover anything else interesting the city has to offer. So... without further ado, Elephant Trunk Hill (as best I could do without paying the exorbitant entry fee to the vista below),
the Gold and Silver Pagodas,
the Solitary Beauty Park,
the Old City Wall,
And finally... well not too much else. Unless you consider a series of very elaborate and eerily familiar looking bridge designs something worth seeing. In which case... here is the Guilin Golden Gate:
Here is the Guilin London Bridge (notably not the Tower Bridge):
And finally here is a bridge that seems to match the Guilin spirit: unnecessarily high and fancy. Ha, what does that even mean?
After wandering the city in the rain we collect our bags and taxi to the train station for our the third installment of our increasingly popular China Train Series Spectacular. This time, an overnight attempt in 3rd class! At least we have seats this time. In the next entry, we ramp up the speed as Jon and I embark for Hong Kong at a breakneck pace through Guangzhou and Shenzhen. Sleep is for the weak.
the Gold and Silver Pagodas,
the Solitary Beauty Park,
the Old City Wall,
And finally... well not too much else. Unless you consider a series of very elaborate and eerily familiar looking bridge designs something worth seeing. In which case... here is the Guilin Golden Gate:
Here is the Guilin London Bridge (notably not the Tower Bridge):
And finally here is a bridge that seems to match the Guilin spirit: unnecessarily high and fancy. Ha, what does that even mean?
After wandering the city in the rain we collect our bags and taxi to the train station for our the third installment of our increasingly popular China Train Series Spectacular. This time, an overnight attempt in 3rd class! At least we have seats this time. In the next entry, we ramp up the speed as Jon and I embark for Hong Kong at a breakneck pace through Guangzhou and Shenzhen. Sleep is for the weak.
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